(text-rotate-y:57)["Jax? A-are you...?"]
(text-rotate-y:290)["Holy shit. They're moving."]
(text-rotate-y:40)["Oh my god. I t-think he's... opening his eyes...!"]
[[Open eyes.]]You open your eyes, and are blinded for a moment, despite being in a bed in a dark pillowfort. You try to move, and bolts of pure pain shoot throughout your entire being.
God. Your entire body is sore. You almost ask what happened to you, but as your tired voicebox barely sqeuaks out anything, you end up... remembering.
You look around. Down at this dumb lanky cartoon body.
At these stupid cartoon gloves.
This stupid lavender fur.
You look at everyone around you. Everyone except Caine is here, visiting you. You hang your head in shame, despite everyone circling the bed having a warm but weary grin. ...Aside from Zooble, but they don't have a mouth.
"You... figured it out?" you ask.
Pomni nods. "Yeah. And we're here for you. We're gonna be caring for you for a few days, until you can go out into the light again. And we'll try to help with whatever we can. And if you need any help with the stuff... I saw when... comforting you, during your..." A shock runs down your spine.
"I-I *don't know* what *you're* talking about."
As the words leave your mouth, her expression changes to one of incredible, deep sadness. You feel a pit form in your stomach, and you look nervously at Pomni. She saw everything, and knows your little method of dealing with those feelings.
Well, shit. No use in lying to her.
"Look, c-can we talk about what happened in there... later?" you stammer. "I promise. I //promise// I promise. Just... please."
She nods, but her expression doesn't move one bit.
[["You guys can fucking undo abstractions now?"]]As you say that, everyone looks around the room, a sad look between them all. Your lips kind of tingle at the sensation of being able to swear freely.
Ragatha speaks up. "We... could..."
You tilt your head.
"Caine said he could muster up the power to reverse one... and only, one... abstraction. He couldn't say why." Her demeanor brightens. "But, hey, it worked, and now you're b--"
You interrupt her. "Ugh. That asshole. Why only one? He can change our reality on a whim and he can only..." You clench your eyes shut and hang your head. "And you guys used this chance on me? Are you guys... stupid, or something?" You groan, and roll your head back.
Ragatha stammers. "W-we missed you, and we... wanted a second chance, to--"
"//Anyone// else should have had that second chance. Kaufmo. Queenie. ...Ribbit."
"H-hey, we just figured that--" Before Ragatha can even finish her sentence, you feel your eyes start to burn. You clench your fists. You feel the need to pace, so you start climbing up off the bed.
"I mean... why //not// Ribbit? Since I fucking was resp--" Pomni very gently blocks you from getting off the bed. You comply, but only because moving around sucks right now. "Heyheyhey! ...Hey." She tries to figure out the words. "T-try not to think of it like that, okay? We had our reasons. Caine will... explain why he could do just one to you later. When you're feeling a little better."
Your foot starts to (text-colour:#ff0000)[thump] against the foot of the bed. You feel your breathing get shallower.
"...Can everyone... fuck off... and leave me alone... for an hour or two. Please?"
Everyone nods, quietly and awkwardly waving before making their way out of the pillowfort. You block your eyes at the light from outside, but you notice Gangle is the last one out, giving a worried glance at you from the door before pulling a blanket over it to block light.
Oh my ''GOD.''
[[What the fuck were they thinking?]]They could have brought back anyone.
ANYONE.
Various names fly by in your head, names from people long abstracted. You feel like every one of them is more deserving of it than you. Especially...
Especially Ribbit.
After all... (text-colour:#ff6b6b)[YOU] caused it. If not for (text-colour:#ff6b6b)[YOU], then she would still be here, lucid, and probably happier than you, too. It just... boggles the mind. You clutch the blanket covering you, pull it over your head, and start quietly sobbing. Why you?
Why the asshole that no one likes?
Is it because they want to torment you? Do they want revenge? Or maybe Pomni blabbed and told everyone your stupid little secret. You don't even know which would be worse. You don't even know if there's a difference between those.
"Uh... Jax? I'm, um... I'm here. Just me."
God damn it. It's Pomni. And she for sure just heard you crying like a baby.
You quickly rub the tears from your eyes and pull the blanket down. You look, and she's telling the truth. She slowly walks to the bedside and offers you her hand. You refuse. You start staring down at the floor.
"I know, it's... a lot... to take in... Coming back from... that, and all."
You say nothing.
"I... I want to talk about... in there. And... no bullshit, okay?"
You say nothing.
Pomni stares at you, a worrisome expression on her face.
You sigh, and look away.
"Alright, you got me. I'm a fruit. You can--" You giggle. "--you can go and tell everyone now. Jax is, is, pretending a queer. His quote-unquote 'new' bit where he makes fun of gay people, //again//."
Pomni shakes her head. "Hey, that moment between you and--" She stops herself. "Ahem... ...It really didn't seem like a bit to me, personally."
Great. Now you feel even worse about it.
Silence fills the room for what feels like hours. Pomni clears her throat and tries to think of something to say.
"...I-I don't, uh..." She gulps. "...I think it's... really nice. And I think you would... make a cute woman."
You feel something akin to an icepick going through your chest at those words. "Nice. Thank you for the fucking permission slip, little miss Regular Woman." You flop down back into bed a little too fast and groan as a bolt of pain runs through your entire body.
"Come on, //you know// I didn't mean it like that."
[[You're doing it again.]]You just stay silent, staring at the floor.
Pomni speaks up. "It's just... if it's because you don't, um, trust... me..."
You keep staring at the floor.
"...I know it's... a big thing to trust someone with, and sure, there's no way I can prove it for a fact. But... I'm sure the others... wouldn't mind at all."
You sigh, not shifting your view at all. "So what's the endgame with all this? What, I gotta... put on the fuckin' maid dress or something every time we go out now? What's next, heels? Hot pink lipstick?"
"Jax... What are you even talking about?"
Ugh. You're doing it again.
More silence.
Pomni finally speaks up again. "...Listen. I just thought... with what I saw in there. That you would definitely... be happier if you were... you know... //out//."
...
"And... You looked really cute with that bow." She starts to smile, genuinely, and she looks into your eyes. You feel your face scrunch up and contort in a weird way, and you turn away from her.
"It made my heart melt seeing you like that. I'm serious."
You... feel... embarrassed? Your face is burning, you feel like crying.
You hear Pomni place something on your bedside table, and you turn around. It's a black ribbon.
"We've been... rebuilding. And we're using... all sorts of virtual materials to do so. There was a bit of ribbon left from part of the new stage, and I figured..."
...
"...you could at least try again. Just... try it once? Please? Then you can decide, then you can do whatever with it. Throw it away, bury it, burn it, chuck it into the digital void... whatever you like."
She walks to the door, gives a little awkward wave, and starts to leave. She stops, and turns around.
"And I won't say a word. Not until you've decided. I promise. I //promise// I promise. Okay?"
You shift around and mumble.
"Jax...?"
"...Okay."
...
You quietly murmur a "...t-thank you." towards her.
She does another little wave, then leaves, moving the blanket back into place as she does. She still looked worried, but there was... something about her expression. She didn't seem as crestfallen as when she walked in.
You look at the bow.
[[Well... try it on, you guess.]]
[[Flick it across the room.]]You start to shake as you reach out for the bow.
You feel it.
At any point, someone will pop out.
And call you a fag. Or a queer. Sissy, pansy. Whatever.
You're not supposed to be doing this.
You take the ribbon, and start to tie it up in a bow, on your left ear. You have to keep starting over and over again. It's hard to tie a bow when you're bedridden and on the verge of a panic attack.
You finally manage to tie it relatively nicely, and you glance over to the mirror on the wall.
I-It looks... fine. You guess. At least, as fine as it can be when attached to a 6 foot tall cartoon bunny guy.
You lay back down and sigh.
[[This sucks.]](we haven't made this route yet.)
[[Alright, fine, put the bow on instead.->Well... try it on, you guess.]]The pillow fort you're currently in is pretty much a hospital room, just made of various pillows and blankets. There's nothing to do, nothing to see. It's lit just enough to make it not dark. There are some pillows strown about, for the others to sit on, you figure. The only decorations are a full-body mirror, a clock near the door, and some photos from you and the gang's past adventures. You can't look outside. Not just yet.
You're bored to shit.
Your eyes start to close... your all-over pain subsides for a bit... and you fall asleep. Or as close as a digital character can get to sleeping.
...
[["Jax? Hello? ...Jax?"]]You wake up, bleary eyed. It's Gangle. You glance at the clock near the door. It's... that clock isn't real. God damn it, Caine.
"How long's it been...?"
Gangle nervously rubs her ribbons together. "S-since... the last time I was here? Or since you... y'know."
"Whatever. Either or."
"It's been about three hours since we were last here," Gangle replied. You don't know if she's counting Pomni coming back or not.
"And... //that// happened... 7 weeks ago. G-give or take. You.. know how it is with time here."
You rub the sleep from your eyes and look around. You notice that Zooble isn't with Gangle.
"Whoa. Zooble left you to fend for yourself?"
"...They didn't feel it necessary to come with. Not at the moment, at least."
You feel sick to your stomach. Sick that one of the only people you have left in your life needs an emotional (and sometimes physical!) bodyguard, specifically for you. You start to shake. Why is she even here? If it were the other way around, you would pretend you didn't even exist. You feel a lump start to form in your throat. You figure... if you are back, and this isn't some sort of fucked up abstraction-fantasy-dream... maybe you can attempt to rebuild some of these bridges that you set fire to repeatedly the first time around. You take a deep breath... exhale... and say... "Hey. I'm... I'm sorry."
Gangle raises an eyebrow. Or... her mask does. Whatever. "Huh?"
"Sorry about... You know what?" You throw your hands up. "Fuck it. Everything. I'm sorry for everything I did."
She looks at the floor, thinking. You can sense she doesn't know if you're being genuine or not. Good move, considering your past actions.
"You... don't even have to accept the apology. I just wanted to say."
She still seems unsure. Again, good move on her part.
"And if Zooble doesn't want to visit... I don't blame them. Tell them I'm sorry, too." With this, Gangle realizes that you might... actually... mean it, this time. "I-I'll tell them. Get some more rest, okay?"
"Okay, Nurse Gangle." You rest back into bed, closing your eyes. You hear Gangle... actually giggle at your remark. It feels... bittersweet.
"Okie dokie, patient Jax. Have a good rest, okay?
"Okay."
"...and you look really nice with that bow." Your hear her close the blanket door behind her.
Wait, what fucking b[[THE BOW.]]The bow.
The bow, the bow. (text-colour:magenta)[the bow]
(text-colour:red)[the bow is on the bow is on the bow is on]
you fell asleep wearing it. gangle saw it. she's gonna tell zooble. she's gonna tell everyone.
it'll be your turn now.
it's your turn to be the laughingstock. your turn to be ridiculed, tormented. your turn to be put through hell. for kicks. why do they even bother with you? why would they bring you back for any other reason?
it's what you deserve. for your actions for what you did to ribbit even for what you had to put them through when you abstracted like a selfish little bitch
[[TAKE THAT BOW OFF. NOW.]]You scramble to untie the bow, shaking even more then when you put it on and painfully tugging against your ear a few times. After it's loosened, you shove it deep underneath one of the pillows you're laying on.
Fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck.
Fucking fuck.
God, not like this, man. You can't do this shit. You can't.
You look over at the mirror. You start to just... go blank. And after awhile... you slowly start to grin. It's fine.
Everything's fine.
It's cool.
It's normal.
FUCK
It's fine. It'll be fine.
It's fine. Fine as wine.
You try to breath deeply. You close your eyes, and eventually black out again.
[["Hey. Wakey wakey."]]You blearily open your eyes yet again. It's Zooble.
"Oh. S'up, Zoobs."
They cringe a bit. "Please don't say 'Zoobs' ever again."
You chuckle weakly. "Okay. I won't."
They seem... almost surprised that you didn't fire back with something. There's an awkward silence between you.
"Uh, so... Gangle told me... that you said you're sorry. Not that I don't trust her... Or you... But... I gotta hear this shit with my own..." They look around at themselves. "...whatever the fuck I hear with."
You close your eyes and exhale. It takes a second to muster up the words. "I'm sorry. For all the bullshit I put you guys through. For no reason other than to be an asshole, or a bigot, or a dumbass. For thinking all of it was funny."
Much like Gangle, Zooble seems a bit unsure at first. Again, good move. But after they wait a few seconds for you to tack something mean or offensive on, they notice you keeping silent, and straighten their posture while putting a hand on their... hip... area. "God damn. You... actually serious?"
"I'm serious. Like I told Gangle, you don't have to accept. I just wanted... to say."
They wait for a second, then tilt their head... thing... down. "Apology... partially accepted. Some of that shit you did and said to us... It was just downright cruel."
You nod. "I know." You sigh. "Good enough. I'll take it. Thank you."
They nod back, then clear their throat. "I'm... also sorry. After you... abstracted." A chill goes down your spine. That's the first time anyone's dared to say that near you after what happened. "I realized that... constantly antagonizing you... probably didn't help. And it kind of... messed me up, bad. Knowing that I had a hand in it."
You chuckle weakly again. "Yeah, welcome to my world. Feels like shit, don't it?" Despite the grin you're putting on, you sigh and clench your eyes shut to stop any tears. "Apology accepted."
"...Thanks." They stand around for a few awkward moments before turning to exit. They stop to say something, but rethink it, and exit the room.
You flop back down and sigh before blacking out again.
[[(Later...)]]You wake up on your own this time.
Not having anyone bothering you is sort of nice.
It's... lonely, though.
And there's nothing to do.
And it's dark. ...Not *too* dark, but dark nonetheless.
You try getting up out of bed, but as soon as you try to put weight on your legs, they feel weak, and pain bolts through them. You stop trying to get up.
This sucks. Again.
After a while of having more closed-eye time, you hear a rap upon the blanket-door.
"Yeah, yeah, come in."
It's Pomni. She closes the blanket-door behind her, and looks at you. She notices that you're not wearing the bow, and a sullen look crosses her face for a moment, before trying to look neutral.
"H-how you doing, champ?"
"Oh, //god//. Please do not call me 'champ'. ...And terrible, as per usual."
Pomni nods. "Alright, alright, fine." She giggles, then sighs. "You should be able to walk again in a day. And be able to be in the light again in about... three, I think?"
"According to who?"
"Caine."
"God. You sure he's even telling the truth? What if he's bullshitting again? What if he's wrong, and I'm stuck in here forever?"
"I... I think he can be trusted now."
You sigh.
"A-and, if it does come to that... I'll come in every day, okay? And help you with whatever needs helped with."
You clench your eyes shut. You know this is a nice gesture, from someone that considers you their friend. But your blood starts to boil a little.
"I *don't* need any help."
"I meant in the situation you just asked about, dillweed."
"Dillweed?!" You scoff. "Jesus, don't call me a *dillweed*."
"Okay, I'll call you something worse next time." She laughs, which makes you chuckle as well. You take a deep breath, and exhale. You reach deep underneath the pillow and pluck the ribbon from underneath. Her expression lights up as she sees it. "Y-you... actually kept it near you?" You nod bashfully.
"C-can I... see? You... wearing it, I mean. N-no pressure, of course! Just... I've seen it before, y'know?"
You feel your face heat up. You shakily start to tie the bow, making mistake after mistake... You become more and more flustered. You did this just fine the other day. God damn it. Shit. Fuck.
"M-Mind if I...?"
You huff. "I-I guess you *would* be better at tying a bow, since I clearly have no experience with doing it."
She smiles warmly, walking up to you, gently grabbing the bow... She starts to tie it around your left ear. You shudder a bit at the feeling, the closeness.
After a moment, she steps away. [[She takes a look and starts... just... beaming.]]"Well? How bad does it look?"
Pomni stays silent for a moment, then speaks, almost in a whisper. "It looks really good on you, Jax."
You feel something which feels like a blow to the stomach.
"Yeah, yeah. Very funny..."
"You know I'm not joking. I mean it. Honest."
She very gently and slowly offers you her hand. Shuddering, shaking... you take it into yours... and hold on tightly. At this, she rests her other hand on yours.
You feel something in you... shatter. And start to feel everything all at once. The pain, the happiness, the sadness... Everything, everything you had packed and stuffed neatly into a little hole in your mind is starting to uncompress. And suddenly...
I feel like I'm alive again. After all these years.
I clench her hand harder, and start to sob, quietly. "Pomni... I'm... I'm fucking terrified right now."
(CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE REACHED THE END OF THE DEMO FOR "EVERYONE HUGS EACH OTHER AND CRIES"!)